A “Palaver” of Flatheads?

Tmi00430c I am much taken with the neologism "flathead" coined here among us. 
Such a word deserves a plural in the spirit of an "exaltation" of larks or a "murder" of crows.

Nominations are open.

The Indian gentleman is from the Salish nation, sometimes known as the "flatheads."  This conceit has nothing to do with this Indian people.  (First Nation in Canada) pl

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50 Responses to A “Palaver” of Flatheads?

  1. Jonathan says:

    A rhetoric of flatheads
    A jargon of flatheads
    A cawing of flatheads
    A bleating of flatheads

  2. Cold War Zoomie says:

    Palaver is definitely good. I had to look that one up.
    If we are going for an alliteration:
    A “Fungus” of Flatheads.

  3. Mad Dogs says:

    A “straggle” of flatheads.
    A “swarm” of flatheads.
    A “drove” of flatheads.
    And there’s the old standby of an “blight” of flatheads.

  4. sixpacksongs says:

    I suggest “a sycophony of flatheads.” Second choice, a “pablum.”

  5. Doran Williams says:

    I may have posted this in the Krauthammer comments section. So, here are my suggestions for the group name for Flatheads: Pick One.
    A Skillet of Flatheads.
    A Skittle of Flatheads.
    A Skulk of Flatheads.

  6. CSTAR says:

    A bungling of flatheads?

  7. web says:

    A flail of flatheads?

  8. ked says:

    A huge grid of flatheads blocked the reality-based community at the metro station near AEI.

  9. Cloned Poster says:

    A Flatuence of Flatheads?

  10. John Shreffler says:

    A delusion of Flatheads.

  11. Kate says:

    A fabrication of flatheads?
    A deceit of flatheads.

  12. Charles I says:

    A blithering of Flatheads
    A scheme of Flatheads
    A smothering of Flatheads
    An Orwell of Flatheads
    A lobby of Flatheads
    A cadre of Flatheads
    A derangement of Flatheads
    A feint of Flatheads
    A canard of Flatheads
    A codswallop of flatheads etc, ad nauseum, indeed, a Nausea of Flatheads. . .

  13. An eejit of flatheads.

  14. kim says:

    a coprologue of flatheads.
    or some variant incorporating the “copro”.

  15. frank durkee says:

    A falsity of flatheads?

  16. Leila says:

    Thanks for the chuckle, you all. What a paean to the joys of English. I especially like the Anglo-Saxon skulk, skittle and flail.

  17. sbj says:

    A ‘frenzy’ of flatheads! (They do, after all, always seem frantic on some level.)

  18. Walrus says:

    Actually down here in Australia, a Flathead is a very ugly, but exceedingly tasty, fish, that I enjoy catching occasionally.
    A school of Flatheads is, I think, a correct description.
    For the curious:

  19. larry whalen says:

    With a nod to Babak from his comment above, a Ford of flatheads.

  20. EZSmirkzz says:

    Since the i first read the term in the book “Clan of the Cave Bear” by Jean Auld, flocks of flatheads would inticate the bats in the belfry, swarming nature of the beasts that scare people more than they warrant, and leave large amounts of crap wherever they roost, while remaining true to the intellectual capacities of that ancient breed of humanoid.

  21. rjj says:

    I was going to suggest a blunder of flatheads, but CSTAR got here before me with his/her bungle of flatheads.
    What about a rumsfeld of flatheads? It has a nice sound. [the rumsfeld (lower case) being the proposed measurement unit of the macro-scale clusterf*ck]

  22. rjj says:

    second thought:
    An afflatus of flatheads.

  23. rjj says:

    afterthought 3:
    a fundament of flatheads.

  24. Mad Dogs says:

    In honor of our Down-under denizen Walrus and Australian Rules Football, how about:
    A scrum of Flatheads.
    G’day mate!

  25. elkern says:

    I propose a Pre-Christian military unit: the phalanx. Tightly-packed, square, disciplined, all facing the same direction.
    This looks even better when phrased as “a phalanx of phlatheads”. But better yet, is there an ancient Hebraic term for the same unit?
    -elkern (1st-timer – thanks, Col. Great site)

  26. uncle vester says:

    An encrustation (encrustacean?) of flatheads?
    Well, I reckon we’re gonna hafta burn these goddamn things offa here, they’re encrusted so deep.

  27. Montag says:

    I’d suggest a legion of Flatheads, in sarcastic honor of their chickenhawk proclivities (i.e. their willingness to lead from behind the firing line). As in, “In order to conquer Liechtenstein we’ll need either a legion of Flatheads or one good VMI graduate.”

  28. Ok, here’s my contribution…
    “A Clusterfuck of Flatheads.”
    Pretty much sums them all up, eh?
    SubKommander Dred

  29. Guthman Bey says:

    I don’t follow the comments here usually, so i don’t know how ‘Flathead’ came to be born. Since Krauthammer is a German name however I thought it appropriate to point out that the term flathead does exist in German: Flachkopf.
    Langenscheids dictionary translates it as numbskull.

  30. ikonoklast says:

    A duncery of flatheads?
    Or, not clever but perhaps accurate:
    A corporation of flatheads?
    (Sixpack – “Sycophancy” I love it!)

  31. Ael says:

    When Dorothy first meets the flatheads, in Glinda of Oz, she meets a “throng” of them.

  32. joel hanes says:

    In Glinda Of Oz, L. Frank Baum invented the race of the Flatheads, who keep their brains in a can. The rulers of the Flatheads hoard the canned brains belonging to their subjects.

  33. ww says:

    I liked palaver too. Very nice.
    My humble accidents of effort would be:
    • A snarl of Flatheads can be seen every morning at the coffee shop, taking tiny sips and exhorting one another. Suddenly, as if on cue, every one their cell phones rang at once. It was Mother.
    • A pitter of Flatheads just passed by. I could scarcely hear them gesticulating for all the shuffling.
    • Sitting, minding my own business. I suddenly found myself surrounded by a grapple of Flatheads. They didn’t notice me there. I had to leave.
    • To my mind, the best way to handle a squire of Flatheads is not to engage directly, but to inquire with simple, straight forward questions. Such as, “Did you take _all_ of your meds this morning?,” or, perhaps, “Do you always double knot your laces that way?” The momentary silence is sometimes necessary to finish the crossword.

  34. John O'D says:

    I would suggest a “D’oh!” of flatheads, but I have far too much respect for Homer Simpson.

  35. John Shreffler says:

    A Miasma of Flatheads, that’s it.

  36. Dave of Maryland says:

    If flathead becomes flattop, there is a hair element. A Mohawk of flatheads would be an offense to the natives.
    A buzz of flatheads.
    The old Model-T’s had flat-head engines, if memory serves, and flat tops are aircraft carriers & both have a buzz about them. Looking back at old yearbook pics, it is creepy how short men’s hair had become by the early ’60’s. Just as creepy that they shave it all off now.
    Flatheads buzzing like flies.

  37. jb vanover says:

    A smug of flatheads
    Also like flail o’ flatheads above.

  38. Just an ex grunt says:

    A “flatus (flati?) of Flatheads”
    “Circus”? Maybe a clown or two short of the mark.

  39. Teaeopy says:

    I’m generally averse to names such as “cretin” and “idiot” that were terms originally used for certain classifications of persons who couldn’t help a neurological limitation; the literary references above, however, especially the Baum one, freed me up.
    A surge of flatheads (not meaning the ground forces)
    A think tank of flatheads
    A cut of flatheads
    A run of flatheads
    A levee break of flatheads
    A flathead threat level
    A mushrooom cloud of flatheads

  40. david says:

    When I hear “palaver,” I think of a certain Irish tenor. I am the only one?

  41. robertlewis says:

    Where I come from a flathead is a fish, a catfish to be specific. I would call these neocon smooth skin fish a noodle of flatheads.

  42. Cloned Poster says:

    A Vomitorium of Flatheads?

  43. Martin K says:

    An infestation of flatheads?
    A mould of flatheads?

  44. a leveling of flatheads
    a faecolith of flatheads

  45. different clue says:

    Since flatheads try to flatten out thinking all around them, how about:
    a steamroller of flatheads?
    Or since they are clownish
    in a sinister way, maybe:
    a clowncar of flatheads?
    or to change the spelling a little to make it look more sinister:
    a klownkar of flatheads?

  46. Fred Levine says:

    a “pride” of flatheads

  47. DH says:

    a shirk of flatheads

  48. Indigestible says:

    There seems to be a type of catfish called a flathead. It’s a bottom feeder that eats it’s prey live. It’s also an invasive species, it’s part of the genus Satan and is cannibalistic.
    In homage to these kindred beings I suggest “Mess’o Flatheads”.

  49. W. Patrick Lang says:

    I invite Montag to select the five most appealing collective nouns for us all to vote on. pl

  50. Sidney O. Smith III says:

    A flotsam of Flatheads
    Floating on the Dead Sea
    (laughable attempt at Ger. Manley Hopkins Sprung Rhythm)

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