Iran is building a model aircraft carrier

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"Iran, U.S. officials say, is currently at work building a nonworking replica of an American nuclear-powered aircraft carrier. From the sounds of it, the American intelligence community hasn't quite figured out why Iran is going through the trouble to do that, but the working theory appears to be: so they can blow it in a propaganda stunt. Or, as the New York Times gloriously put it this morning, "presumably for some mysteriously bellicose purposes.""  Slate

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Ah!  How cool!  Possibilities:

1.  Target vessel to be sunk in future exercise.

2.  Experiment in sympathetic magic to learn if real carriers are attracted to come and roost with this one, something like a duck decoy.

3.  Floating tourist attraction so that Iranian children can come and hurl stones at it.

4. Imaginative object concentrating yearning for a real carrier.

I vote for # 1.  pl       

http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2014/03/21/iran_s_fake_aircraft_carrier_u_s_officials_say_iran_navy_might_blow_it_up.html

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34 Responses to Iran is building a model aircraft carrier

  1. b says:

    5. Scenery set for a big screen movie a la Top Gun. Theme: “How the IRAF sunk a carrier.”

  2. Medicine Man says:

    I like #2.

  3. kyooshtik says:

    6. A place for Malaysian Flight 370 to land.

  4. SAC Brat says:

    “2. Experiment in sympathetic magic to learn if real carriers are attracted to come and roost with this one, something like a duck decoy.”
    I’m only buying into #2 if we see satellite imagery of the keels being laid for ten really, really big punt guns too. Maybe they can go one better than the Lepage glue gun anti-aircraft concept and inbed a large Tesla device to create a giant electrical charge to draw a carrier group together.
    #4 sounds like some cargo cult worshipping armaments.

  5. Thomas says:

    1 and 5 are mutually compatible.

  6. Charles I says:

    A bit more ambitious than their previous photoshop missile drill efforts, must be they want a genuine fake to blow it up good for real

  7. steve g says:

    #7.John McCain resurrects his A-4 from
    a Tucson area boneyard, attacks Kamikazee
    style, hurling epithets at Ho Chi Minh
    in final dive.

  8. Tyler says:

    “Sympathetic magic” lol. Nice.

  9. SAC Brat says:

    In the spirit of Ronald Reagan, the current administration should offer some F-35’s to park on that. The folks that supplied F-14 parts could probably help out too. That way everyone gets a piece of the action. Pure bidness.

  10. SAC Brat says:

    I was hoping the Malaysian airplane would land successfully where there was a cargo cult and make their day. (Except for the guy in the back of the crowd going “Uh.. we don’t have any stairs for that.”)

  11. JohnH says:

    They building an Ark. When it rains it pours.
    They’ll call it the Ark of Muhammad ibn Hasan al-Mahdī, the 12th Imam. Washington, London, Paris and the Gulf States will be swept away.
    Lots of pigeons are being distributed to mountain tribes.

  12. C L says:

    The Mullahs are working on a pre-quel to Argo, probably called ‘Operation Eagle De-Claw’.
    They have a large deposit of 1970s US weapons rotting away which would serve as explodable props for a revisionist tale of how they stopped the attack and threw the great Satan out of the land. All they lack is the launch pad for the attacks.
    I wonder if they will be able to restrain themselves and not name the Nimitz class carrier
    USS R. Reagan
    Operation Eagle Claw http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Eagle_Claw

  13. Fred says:

    #4 all the way. Ever since their President lost that “Hitler” title they’ve really been feeling deprived. Even the Israeli’s haven’t been trying to call for an attack on them in weeks.

  14. mac says:

    Colonel,
    It’s curious to say the least….not necessarily sinister though.
    More an expression of the competing centers of power within the Iranian polity. Hardliners trying to needle the USN and cause trouble for Rouhani, is my guess. Probably a waste of time on both fronts.
    Off Topic: I did not realize Nuland is married to Robert Kagan. Does anyone still believe Ukraine is not absolutely part of a play designed to weaken Putin for his intervention in Syria?
    Mac

  15. Brien J Miller says:

    They should by one of the many fine 1/350 kits out there, and use easily looked up miniatures techniques on the web to film its untimely destruction by some heroic group of revolutionary guards. That way they feed the coffers of a hungry hobby industry, obtain the usually debunkable propaganda footage desired, and can spend the real money on more valuable social needs of which there must be a few.
    I wish them luck.

  16. Mark Logan says:

    “After many years have slipped by, the leaders of the Iranians, opposed by the Fates,and damaged by the sanctions,
    build an Aircraft Carrier of mountainous size, through Pallas’s divine art, and weave planks of fir over its ribs: they pretend it’s a votive offering…”

  17. The beaver says:

    Colonel
    They will anchored it next to Kish island so that all those spooks can get some work doneon their 48-hour visa 🙂

  18. Ishmael Zechariah says:

    Might be that they need a venue for a “mission accomplished” video shoot. Seems like clowns are running the world.
    Ishmael Zechariah
    P.s: Things may get warmish in Turkey in the next few days. The head clown is in trouble.

  19. Alba Etie says:

    IZ
    You and Kunuri stay safe – but keep us posted .

  20. walrus says:

    Simple answer: A training aid.
    This is an American carrier, that is a camel.
    This is an American carrier, that is a truck.
    This is an American carrier, that is my Sister.
    This is an Aerican carrier, that is ……..

  21. b says:

    Ha, looks like I was right. It is part of a movie.
    Machine translation from a Persian website:
    http://fa.alalam.ir/news/1578265
    /quote/
    But the reality is that rare Talebzade renowned filmmaker and film making preparations for our new feature film, the carrier film is part of the decor.
    Making excellent movie “Airbus” aircraft crashed in Iran in the Persian Gulf with the theme of the American ship and directed by Nader Talebzadeh Paxton started.
    Airbus Airlines Flight 655 Islamic Republic on June 12, 1367, on the aircraft carrier missile, “Vincennes” America crashed and killed all 290 on board.
    /endquote/

  22. cloned_poster says:

    Maybe Iran just took delivery of
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P-800_Oniks
    And needs a target

  23. Allen Thomson says:

    #1 sounds plausible. Iran tested their Hoot version of the Russian Shkval rocket torpedo in that area a few years back.
    http://www.harpoondatabases.com/encyclopedia/Entry762.aspx

  24. nick b says:

    I agree with b. It doesn’t seem like they’re making any effort to hide what they’re doing. Perhaps it’s a movie prop?
    Seeing as it’s no big secret, maybe we could just ask them what it’s for?
    Do kids in Iran build models, play with them until they get bored, then blow them up with fireworks? I always enjoyed doing that, still do.
    Somewhere, Gomez Addams is deeply hopeful…

  25. kyooshtik says:

    Walrus,
    I like that. Maybe an Iranian Sesame Street program where you juxtapose the model aircraft carrier with a camel, a female (veiled, of course), a basket of cherries and a copy of the Koran and sing “one of these things is not like the others…one of these things doesn’t belong.”
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Sgk-ZYxKxM

  26. I built a model carrier when I was 12!
    Seriously, a carrier without the accompanying fleet to protect will be a plum assignment for the pilots tasked to sink it. At least I hope they give the pilots the job because missiles are no fun at all.

  27. Nathan Stroupe says:

    A movie prop, for a film on Iran Air 655 (shot down by the US Navy on July 3, 1988). Apparently the movie will be directed by Nader Talebzadeh and Paxton Winters.
    Source:
    http://www.mashreghnews.ir/fa/news/295806
    See also: http://isna.ir/en/news/92041207490/Iran-US-to-coproduce-film-on-1988-US-attack and
    http://www.payvand.com/news/13/may/1055.html

  28. Thomas says:

    mac
    And, double good, it weakens Obama for being such a passive leader. Though in private the neos use a u in the p word.

  29. Thomas says:

    He shot down a Syrian plane today.

  30. Ishmael Zechariah says:

    Thomas,
    tayyip is acting the hero, but he cannot change the agenda. Most Turks are anticipating a videotape, widely rumored to be disclosed on 3/25, in which he is the chief performer. If I learn something I will post it on SST.
    Ishmael Zechariah

  31. elkern says:

    I still like #2. Makes me curious though; just how to aircraft carriers mate?

  32. Petrous says:

    http://www.al-monitor.com/pulse/originals/2014/03/iran-movie-aircraft-crash-filming.html
    Al Monitor reports today that it is for production of a Movie !

  33. Amir says:

    Best laughs, who last laughs: quoting
    ” On the brilliance of US media and intelligence service: THIS IS HILARIOUS
    “Fake U.S. ship spotted in Gulf is a movie set, Iranian media say”. As you may remember, the New York Times said this about the ship: “”presumably for some mysteriously bellicose purposes”. ”

  34. Thomas says:

    Thanks, we look forward to hearing from you.

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